I watched the Christmas episode of Glee last night. Kurt and Blaine sang a duet, “Baby, It’s Cold Outside.” One of the people I follow on Twitter mentioned that it’s the date rape anthem, but I didn’t really think anything of it until I really listened to the lyrics the characters were singing. Holy moly: super creepy. I posted about it on Facebook, and while most of the people who commented agreed, my friend Vera made the counterargument that the woman (for the sake of clarity, we’ll call it the woman’s part even though Chris Colfer knocked the singing out of the park) merely wishy-washy and a victim of societal expectations, and that the man is playing along with her fake reluctance. Here is my line-by-line analysis through both lenses:
HER LINE/HIS LINE/BOTH
GLASS HALF FULL INTERPRETATION
GLASS HALF EMPTY INTERPRETATION
I really can’t stay
She has to go
She has to go
But baby, it’s cold outside
He’d like her to stay
He’d like her to stay
I’ve got to go away
She has to go
She has to go
But baby, it’s cold outside
He’d still like her to stay
He’d still like her to stay
This evening has been...
She enjoys his company
She enjoys his company
Been hoping that you’d drop in
He’s open with his emotions
He’s been planning this for a while
...So very nice
She really enjoys his company
This is a cocktail party classic – a polite attempt to indicate the end
I’ll hold your hands, they’re just like ice
Holding hands is nice
He’s physically restraining her
My mother will start to worry
She doesn’t want to worry her mom
There are people who know where I am – you won’t get away with this
Beautiful, what’s your hurry?
He’s distracted by her beauty
He doesn’t care if her mom is worried
My father will be pacing the floor
She doesn’t want to worry her dad
Not just my mom knows – my dad knows, too
Listen to the fireplace roar
Fireplaces are romantic
He doesn’t care if her dad is worried. Dad must not have a gun.
So really, I’d better scurry
She’s got to go
She really needs to go
Beautiful, please don’t hurry
He’s really enjoying her company
He doesn’t care. Also, we have our fourth instance of referring to her not by her name -- possibly an attempt at depersonalization to make it easier for him to commit his planned crime
But maybe just half a drink more
She doesn’t really want to leave and needs an excuse to stay
This is where she really screws up
Put some records on while I pour
Everyone loves music, and they like the same kind
He doesn’t want her watching while he pours the drinks
The neighbors might faint
She’s only reluctant because of what other people might think
She’s reminding him that there are more witnesses
Baby, it’s bad out there
He’s concerned about her safety
He keeps using the weather as an excuse. Does he not have anything better?
Say, what’s in this drink?
She thinks the drink is delicious and wants to know what the secret ingredient is
RED ALERT!
No cabs to be had out there
It’s not safe for her to drive, and cabs are notoriously difficult to find during inclement weather – she should just hang out with him
Why doesn’t he offer to drive her home? Why is she dependent on cabs?
I wish I knew how...
She likes him so much…
Her mind is muddled from her roofied drink…
Your eyes are like starlight now
He thinks she’s really pretty and is open about saying so
The mickey he slipped her is causing her eyes to lose focus and water.
...To break this spell
…that she can’t tear herself away
…and she realizes the grave danger that she has stumbled into
I’ll take your hat, your hair looks swell
Every woman worries about hat hair, and he’s so into her, he thinks hers is pretty
He’s starting to undress her!
I ought to say, “No, no, no sir”
This is what her mother taught her to do
She ought to, but she can’t because of the drugs
Mind if I move in closer?
He’s a gentleman who asks before invading personal space
He’s starting to overwhelm her physically
At least I’m going to say that I tried
If people ask, she’s not a total slut
She’s starting to worry whether this is going to stand up in court
What’s the sense in hurting my pride?
He’s sensitive
This is about him, his pride, and the notches in his bedpost
I really can’t stay
More of what her mother taught her to stay
She’s repeating herself in a desperate attempt to escape
Oh, baby, don’t hold out
He’d like her to make up her mind
He’s says this to all the girls he date rapes
Baby./oh, but it’s cold outside
It’s cold outside
He’s grateful for the excuse the weather has given him to keep her with him a little longer to execute his nefarious plans; she’s kicking herself for coming over without checking the weather report
I simply must go
Is there a glass half full aspect to this poor woman repeating that she wants to leave to no avail?
More repeating herself in the hopes that she’ll be able to leave unscathed
But baby, it’s cold outside
Or that this guy keeps ignoring her with weather reports?
More repeating of the dumbest excuse ever
The answer is no
No glass half full aspect to this one for sure
No means no
But baby, it’s cold outside
More sharing of the weather because she hasn’t noticed
It’s like he’s deaf and mentally challenged
This welcome has been...
She’s worried about what people will think and has resolved to leave
She’s trying politeness
How lucky that you dropped in
He’s enjoyed her visit very much
Yes, lucky that she stumbled into his death trap of a home
...So nice and warm
She enjoys his company
Still trying politeness and pretending
Look out the window at that storm
If she likes nice and warm, she’s not going to get that outside
It’s be raped or freeze to death
My sister will be suspicious
Her sister knows that she likes him
My sister knows where I am and whom I’m with
Gosh, your lips look delicious
He really thinks she’s pretty
The Cialis has kicked in and he’s deciding where to start
My brother will be there at the door
Her brother may interrupt them at an inopportune moment, embarrassing everyone involved
You won’t get away with this
Waves upon the tropical shore
He’s invoking warm locales to keep her warm
I have no idea – if it’s so cold outside, why is he talking about the beach?
My maiden aunt’s mind is vicious
Her aunt thinks she’s a slut as it is
My aunt will kill you in a violent and hideously unpleasant way if you do this
Gosh, your lips are delicious
He’s moved in for a kiss good night and enjoyed it tremendously
Despite her repeated attempts to leave and her overt refusal, he has kissed her
But maybe just a cigarette more
She enjoyed it too, and is looking for an excuse to extend her time with him
She’s hoping that if she keeps her mouth busy with something that can burn him, that will keep him away while she comes up with a plan to escape
Never such a blizzard before
The weather is truly bad, so she should stay
He knows what she’s trying and is telling her it won’t work because of the horrible storm
I’ve gotta get home
If the weather is so bad, she really should get home
She’s really, really, really desperate to leave
But baby, you’d freeze out there
He’s worried about her health and safety
He doesn’t care
Say lend me a coat
She’s requesting his help in maintaining her health and safety
She’s trying an appeal to his better side
It’s up to your knees out there
The situation is too dangerous even to lend a coat – it won’t help
He doesn’t have a better side
You’ve really been grand
She realizes that she’s run out of excuses and is trying more cocktail party techniques to bring the evening to an end
More appeals to his better side
I thrill when you touch my hand
More opening up of his emotions
All he can think about is his animalistic need
But don’t you see?
She recognizes his openness and appreciates it but is more worried about…
She’s trying an appeal to logic
How can you do this thing to me?
He’s hurt that she’d leave him at a critical juncture in their relationship, just when they were getting so close
Didn’t every boy try this excuse in high school? Blue balls won’t kill you. Really.
There’s bound to be talk tomorrow
…people’s cruel gossip
People will find out, and you’re going to be in trouble
Think of my lifelong sorrow...
He cares so much about her…
Is the logic working?
At least there will be plenty implied
They won’t be open about the gossip, they’ll just be really snide and hint
Even if they don’t say it openly, everyone will talk
...If you got pneumonia and died
…and her health, especially since this seems like the start of a beautiful relationship; he can see himself marrying her and having kids with her
No, the logic is not working. Apparently, it’s sleep with him or catch her death of pneumonia; it’s unclear whether he’ll be sorry that she died or that he never got to have sex with her
I really can’t stay
She still cares more about the gossipers
SHE HAS TO GO
Get over that holdout
He’d like her to get over the gossipers
He’s losing patience
Baby, /oh, but it’s cold outside
Everyone will accept cold weather as an excuse for snuggling
Cold weather is dangerous in so many different ways
