Continental Presidents Club v. Delta Crown Room

Presidents Club: three different kinds of cheese (cheddar, Monterey jack, and Rondele), assorted Pepperidge Farms crackers, breadsticks, and potato chips.

Crown Room: one kind of cheese (white cheddar), crackers with a bunch of seeds on them, hummus, Nutella (allergic to hazelnuts), and olives.

Advantage: Crown Room (come on -- olives and hummus!)

Presidents Club: complimentary coffee, tea, cocoa, soft drinks, and assorted alcoholic beverages.

Crown Room: complimentary coffee, tea, cocoa, powdered vanilla latte mix, soft drinks, and assorted alcoholic beverages.

Advantage: Crown Room

Presidents Club: free wi-fi

Crown Room: T-Mobile broadband internet service, $9.95/day

Advantage: Presidents Club

Presidents Club: cushy chairs

Crown Room: cushy chairs

Advantage: tie

Presidents Club: flat-screen tvs

Crown Room: flat-screen tvs

Advantage: tie

Presidents Club: 8-10 cubes with phone and internet connection

Crown Room: small cube farm

Advantage: Crown Room

When I walked in here to the Crown Room at Logan Airport in Terminal A, I had my doubts when I saw “Best Airport Lounge Award 2006, 2007” sign, but now I’m a believer.

I love Boston

I'm not sure why I love Boston so much, but I do. It helps that the times that I've been here, the weather has been spectacular, and I've never been here in the winter. It feels a little like Chicago in terms of neighborhoodiness, but the people here have a little more edge. I like it enough that I would even consider moving here if the right job presented itself.

I had coffee with a former colleague yesterday, and I don't know why, but I'm still surprised to find out from people who leave the firm just how much Kool-Aid they were only pretending to drink. It seems that there are many more gimlet- and clear-eyed people enmeshed throughout the company, who have all been beaten down for speaking truth to power. So we all stay quiet, which is a shame, because how awesome would it be for there to be a massive revolution? Alas, instead when you point out that the emperor has no clothes, you're told that you're not being a team player, or that you're being sharp-elbowed, or the worst, that you're not demonstrating leadership qualities. I love that last one, because I think (I hope, anyway) that at other publicly-traded companies, being open and honest and pointing out the pitfalls of a particular course of action is valued and rewarded. I guess it depends completely on who your manager is, and that's true everywhere. Until I figure out what I want to do next, I' m going to continue to pretend to drink the Kool-Aid, try not to point out when colleagues are incompetent and fail to add value, and keep my head down as much as possible.

Yucky Neighbors in Hartford

They turned on the television at 11:45pm. That was a HUGE signal to me that things were going to get really personal, and based on what I started to hear (and I'm trying desperately to block out the memory), I got my earplugs in just in the nick of time. I wish I'd had the cojones to set the alarm for 3:30am, but I didn't see any reason to punish myself. :) Earplugs RULE.

Mishmash

I have some pretty healthy self-esteem that I believe I've earned. I'm smart, I'm funny, I'm attractive, and doggone it, people like me. Match makes me feel ugly and awkward and uncomfortable in my own skin. I didn't fight my way through adolescence and my early 20s to feel like this again. And I'm tired of people saying that I have to give it a chance, and that I'm not being fair, and that this is the way that people meet in 2008. I hate it.

I read The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch on my flight from Cleveland to Hartford today (there are NO DIRECT FLIGHTS between Houston and Hartford -- unbelievable). If you haven't heard of it, it's a book based on what was literally the last lecture of Professor Randy Pausch at Carnegie Mellon University (if you click the link, it'll take you to the lecture's page on the Carnegie Mellon site, where you can find more links to the lecture on YouTube). Professor Pausch is dying of metastatic pancreatic cancer, and his last lecture on life lessons is amazing. The book doesn't have quite the same punch as his actual lecture did, but that didn't stop me from leaking tears for the entire flight. It makes me feel like I should be doing something more valuable with my life instead of earning a good living at a company that professes to help other companies get better. The Fortune 1000 doesn't need me.

I know that there are a lot of organizations with which I could volunteer, and maybe that would make me feel better. I'll look into it when I get home. Between The Last Lecture and The World Is Flat, it seems like there must be a way for me to make money and sell out to the man AND make the world a better place at the same time.

The people in the room next to mine here in Hartford are LOUD. Not like that! At least, not yet. I could hear every word of their conversation like they were having about their nephew and random other stuff. They've gone to dinner, so it's blessedly quiet, but I'm dreading when they come back drunk and amorous. EW EW EW EW.

I read an article in Forbes or Business Week on the flight from Houston to Cleveland on the glass ceiling in Korea, and how men there don't think women have the chops to work in the corporate world. I'm very glad to have been born and reared in the US, where my parents told me I was the smartest kid in the class and so had to work much, much harder. There was no question I could be whatever I wanted, as long as whatever I wanted was white collar.

Ok, enough with this random post. This is what happens when I write without really thinking it through. It's been a while, though, and I had some stuff bouncing around in my head that I needed to get out.

I'll keep you updated on the people next door. Ugh.

Match is WORK

And I don't know if I want a second job.

How Last Night's Astros Game Made Me Want to Stay Single

MORE FREE TICKETS TO THE ASTROS!!!  I love that my friends have awesome connections, and that they're willing to share the spoils of those connections with ME!

The Astros won last night, more due to the excellent fielding, I think, than a strong outing by Backe.  I'm hoping he's just settling in, because he had so much going for him before he went out for Tommy John surgery.  Also, the Marlins aren't that good, I don't think.

Anyway, Carrie and I were sitting next to two, young, married couples.  The wives were very pretty and teachers.  Who knows what the hell the husbands did.  The guys sat together, and while one was just a normal guy, the other one was a COMPLETE ASS.  He didn't shut up the whole game and constantly bumped Carrie throughout.  He was verbally abusive to his wife and cheered for the Astros in really wrong, negative way.  He nearly kicked the head of the 2-year-old in front of him.  And after 3 and a half hours of sitting next to this douchebag, I nearly took my profile off of Match.  

What is wrong with women that they put up with that kind of crap?  He was SO disrespectful to his wife, in front of their friends and everyone else sitting near them at the game.  And she just sat there and took it.  She wasn't happy about it, but she didn't do anything.  WTF???  

I've had my differences with my parents, but I'm so grateful to them for rearing me to have a spine.  I'm not settling for a jackass like that, and I've decided that despite my misgivings about having children, I kind of need to have them to make up for his horrific offspring.  I know that sounds arrogant and gross, but seriously -- he and his wife have kids, and they're going to turn out just like them.  We don't need more of that in the world.

I'm a Total Freak

No, I know -- this comes as a surprise to exactly ZERO of you. But I've discovered some additional things about myself as a result of being on Match.

The last time I did online dating (about 4 years ago), I figured out that if a man could write e-mail using good grammar and punctuation, he could be completely insane in every other way, but he was in, and the good guy with bad grammar and punctuation was out. Maybe unfair, but that's the way it is, yo. And actually, it's not that unfair: at least people have control over that -- you don't have control over whether you're handsome or smart.

This time, I've figured out that if you tell me I'm pretty or cute or whatever or if you express what I consider to be inappropriate admiration of my skills or talents, I will be suspicious of you and move you down the list. If, on the other hand, you send me intelligent book recommendations? I'll probably show up at your house with a can of Reddi-wip and wearing nothing but a trench coat.

That's an exaggeration, obviously, but seriously -- I am a total freak. Online dating is starting to crack me up.

OH! There's also a guy who has been sending me unintelligible e-mails! I'll reproduce the e-mail chain below because it's THAT GOOD!!! I've diligently included all the typos. He writes a lot about how lucrative trading is and how rich he is. I've added my comments in bold.

From: Him
Date received: April 7
Subject: Hi
Whats up Hot mama? [Editor's Note: my screen name is literatechick. I don't know where this Hot mama crap is coming from.] I'm smarc and people say I look funny. [Editor’s Note: in my profile, I wrote that I’m looking for someone smart, funny, who can take care of himself, has whimsy in his heart, and is totally into me.] How long have you been a member and have you had any luck yet. This is my first time as a member so I'm a virgin so to speak. [Editor’s Note: I don’t like his turn of phrase here. We haven’t even met.]
------
From: Me
Date sent: April 8
Subject: Re: Hi
Spelling and grammar are really important to me. I've been on Match for about a month. [Editor’s Note: not friendly, but also not unfriendly, considering it’s me.]
------
From: Him
Date received: April 8
Subject: hello
I can't believe ya left me hanging like that. I'm upset with you. No, just kidding, write me back. [Editor’s Note: huh? Hanging like what? I answered his question.]
------
From: Me
Date sent: April 8
Subject: Re: hello
I did write you back. I told you that spelling and grammar are important to me and that I've been on Match for about a month. [Editor's Note: I'd like credit for staying polite and neutral in tone.]
------
From: Him
Date received: April 9
Subject: hi
you wrote me back when. Call me next time. I gave you my number didn't I. [Editor’s Note: (a) WTF? (b) no, you didn’t give me your number, and (c) give me a reason to call you. So far I don’t see one. Did you bother to read my profile at all??? It’s RICH with conversation bait.]
------
From: Him
Date received: April 9
Subject: hello
Never heard from ya. Are you out of the market or what. looking forward to hearing from you. [Editor’s Note: I’m starting to think he’s got me mixed up with someone else or has taken that silly class on how to make women feel insecure so they will go out with you.]
------
From: Me
Date sent: April 10
Subject: Re: hello
Please stop contacting me. [Editor’s Note: it’s all fun and games, but I’ve had enough. I didn’t see anything in his profile that I liked, and he’s clearly delusional. I thought my message was simple and to the point.]
------
From: Him
Date sent: April 10
Subject: Re: Re: hello
I will respect your wishes, but is there some reason why? Could you please tell me. I mean did I say or do anything. I just want to know so I don't make the same mistake. [Editor’s Note: despite a lack of commas, this was actually a comprehensible e-mail that seemed to indicate he was actually reading MY e-mails. Too bad he sent the next two before I could respond.]
------
From: Him
Date sent: April 10
Subject: ?
you're weird dude. no wonder you haven't had any luck. i starting to think you're some kind of scam artist. Well don't try that with me because like the song goes, I ain't never scared. [Editor’s Note: swinging here between reasonable human being and total poser. It doesn’t bode well. I wasn’t planning to respond anyway, but I almost responded to the next one.]
------
From: Him
Date sent: April 10
Subject: Re: Re: hello
Fine, you're a freak anyways. [Editor’s Note: he’s right, I am a total freak, but not for the reasons he thinks. I opened this e-mail first, because it was the most recent one in my box, and nearly fell over laughing in the Presidents Club at O’Hare last night. He’s got some serious mood swing issues, but he’s really entertaining nevertheless. I’ll almost miss him.]

I'm going to keep and treasure those e-mails FOREVER. If he only knew how true his last e-mail was!!!

Astros!

I wasn't going to go, y'all. I didn't buy tickets, I didn't look into buying tickets, and I didn't even really know when the home opener was. But as I was sitting on my couch finishing up work, I could hear more foot traffic by my window, and when I glanced out, I saw all the brick red and white t-shirts, and the 7s and the 17s and the 9s, and I was a little sad and jealous.

And then Kathy called with TWO TICKETS that miraculously fell into our laps!!! It was like God wanted me to go to the game! I jumped into the shower (I work from home -- it's not always a priority when it's just me), Kathy drove to get the tickets, and then we walked to the game.

First pitch was at 6:05, which we missed, but since I wasn't going to get to go at all, getting there in the top of the third at 7pm was TOTALLY FINE. We were in the second to last row in the top tier right behind home plate, and I'm more and more convinced that there are very few bad seats at the Juice Box. As long as you're behind home plate, you can see everything you need to see. I ate a footlong hot dog with chili and cheese (yes, I feel a little sick writing about it, thank you for asking) and spilled some diet Dr. Pepper on the lady sitting in front of me. She was very nice about it.

The game was scoreless until the 7th, when Lance Berkman hit a solo home run. Yay!! Then Carlos Lee hit another solo home run right behind him! Super fantastico! (Does anyone know where I got that? I say it to myself a lot, and I have no idea where it came from, and it kind of annoys me both that I say it and that I don't know the source.)

Then Wandy Rodriguez got pulled out the game, and the middle reliever was replaced with a pinch hitter. Miguel Tejada (I think) hit a home run in the 8th, and then the Astros put in the last pitcher of the night, Valverde, at the top of the 9th. I don't refer to him as the last pitcher just because it was the ninth inning and nobody came in to replace him, but last because THERE WAS NOBODY ELSE WARMING UP IN THE BULLPEN FOR THE ASTROS. Y'all, when I say that the Astros have 1 pitcher and 4 hitters, it's not a joke. It's the sad truth. With Wandy's performance from last night and my high hopes for Brandon Backe, I might be persuaded to amend that to 2 or 3 pitchers and 4 hitters, but seriously -- that's it.

Valverde gave up THREE runs in the top of the 9th. If you can do basic arithmetic, that means that he gave up enough runs to the CARDINALS, our SWORN ENEMIES, to TIE THE GAME. And the Astros have not historically been good about turning things around in later innings, at least not when I'm there watching completely stressed out. I thought I was going to throw up from the stress and tension.

And then in the bottom of the 9th, someone got on base (I can't remember who, and I can't find a play-by-play), and Miguel Tejada, God bless him and his steroids, hit a walk-off home run, and all was right in Catherineland. I got to watch a baseball game live, I got to eat a hot dog, my team won, and Kathy and I went for ice cream at Amy's afterward. GOOD TIMES.

I think I'm a simpler woman than some of you give me credit for.

Where Am I?

April 8-10: Chicago
April 17-18: San Antonio
April 22-23: Hartford, CT
April 24-25: Boston
April 29-May 1: Washington, DC
May 2-4: Las Vegas, Baby!
May 7-9: San Francisco
May 21-23: Washington, DC
May 26-29: Washington, DC
June 1-2: Washington, DC
June 12-13: Chicago
June 25-27: Washington, DC
July 9-11: Washington, DC
July 21-25: Washington, DC

Silda Wall Spitzer

It's late, and I should be in bed, but I wanted to get this written while it's still just a teeny, tiny bit relevant.

During the height of the Spitzer scandal, a friend and I were talking, and she noted that I'm a little obsessed with Silda. She was wrong -- I'm a lot obsessed with Silda (but not in a crazy, dangerous way; more in a "I seriously do NOT understand what kind of idiot cheats on a woman like that" way).

My mom would be really happy if I were Silda. By all public accounts, she's gracious and funny and warm and ladylike. I think she's stunning. She went to Harvard Law, married someone who on paper seems like the kind of man straight women want to marry, had a ridiculously successful career in the law, and then started a charity because she was bothered by how lavish the children's birthday parties were in her social circle. Silda did everything "right," and her husband still f*ed whores.

I think of my friends' husbands, and I know that they would never do that. But I'll bet Silda never thought Eliot would do that either. I don't know many women who would marry a man knowing that he was likely to engage prostitutes, but most of the women I know are really smart. But Silda also strikes me as really smart.

So I'm left to think that she either knew and took her chances, or she had no idea what he was like after being married to him for decades. Both of those options SUCK.

You combine that with the whole mother thing, and what's a smart, ambitious, hard-working 35-year-old single woman supposed to do? Spitzer and the work mothers make being a career spinster seem really attractive.

Also, tangentially, I think she's a fool for not leaving him. If it were just the two of them, Eliot and Silda, I would understand that their lives have been entwined and enmeshed with each for over 20 years, and there's a lot there that we don't now. But she has three daughters, and I think she owes it to them to show them that it's not ok to stay with a man who cheats on you with whores. I think she's doing her girls a great disservice at this point. I don't think she has to disparage their father in front of them, but I think she definitely has to set the example for them, regardless of how much she loves him or her own heart is broken.

Larry Greatman

I'm writing about something that I just haven't been able to write about for a while because it makes me cry every time I start to type, and tonight is no different, but I feel like I need to do it.  My friend Shana, the spendthrift who married the miser, the couple who laugh their as*es off together, just lost her father to lung cancer.

What's been so shocking about this is how fast it went.  We have a former work colleague who was diagnosed with Stage IV lung cancer last year, and we've been blessed that he's responded well to his treatment.  Frankly, I was lulled into thinking that Shana's father would be equally blessed.

He was diagnosed in January, and at the end of March, the doctors discovered that the chemotherapy wasn't shrinking his tumors, and that in fact, the cancer had spread.  Larry, Dana (his wife & Shana's mom), Shana, and her brother made the decision to bring him home for hospice care.  The doctors said "Two weeks to two months."

And I got lulled into false hope again.  All I heard was two months.  Creative ideas were proposed for how to help Shana get through the considerable amount of work on her plate from her parent's house in Lancaster.  Her parents got high-speed wireless so she could work more effortlessly.  Arrangements were underway.

Larry passed away this past Tuesday, just a week after going home, and I believe that the Greatman family's heart is broken. 

I only met Shana's dad a few times.  They stopped by the office once to see where Shana worked, and they were so cute -- very much in love with each other and proud to bursting of Shana.  I met him again when Shana graciously invited me to a wedding shower in Lancaster knowing that I was at loose ends in Los Angeles.  He and Jeff (Shana's fiance, now husband) escaped to do "manly" things while the girls played, and he delighted in all of it.  That delight was nothing compared to the sunbeams streaming out of him at Shana's wedding, seeing his beloved daughter marrying a good man and starting a new life. 

He was one of the most vibrant people I've ever met, but he was also fundamentally kind and generous to his core.  Larry was the kind of father who, once he figured out that you loved Shana and were loved by Shana, opened his arms and welcomed you into his sunshine, and goodness, what a lot of sunshine there was!

Shana and her family are sitting shivah and grieving.  Shana's mother has posted that she lost the love of her life.  They're all in an incredible amount of pain.  I can't be there physically for Shana or her family, but if you could, say a little prayer and send a little love to the west coast, and give your people a little extra squeeze.  I started building some bridges with my family because of Shana and Larry, and my heart is a little broken, too.