Truer words

On girls' night out, I often propose this toast:

Here's to the men that we love,
Here's to the men that love us,
But the men that we love aren't the men that love us,
So f@&% the men, here's to us.

It's a little bitter, but holy moly, this past week proved it to be fairly true. I have no game when it comes to men. None. Does anyone know where I could get some?

I think I'm going to have to amend the 5 things I'm looking for in a man. It used to be that I was looking for someone smart, funny, who could take care of himself, and was totally into me. I think it's more accurate to say that all I'm looking for in someone is that he's SNARKY. Liz called snarky my drug of choice, and when she said it, it was one of those weird, random moments of truth when you can feel something important slip into place. I could almost hear angels sing. And yes, I know it's kind of sad that snarky was the thing that caused my profound moment. I wish I could have one about work, but you don't get to pick those moments, man.

So all 3 of you who are reading this -- please keep your eyes peeled for snarky men and send them my way. Apparently they don't even have to be that nice or, tragically, that into me. I seriously have some issues, y'all.